Put food in mouth. Put movies in eyes. That is all.

Planes, trains, and automobiles for me. Del Griffith lives.

Why am I working like six days this week? Not fair, capitalism. Not fair.

I'm making my homemade eggnog out of vodka and ice cubes.

I really love my family.

Two weeks of online gaming. Leave the crate of Hot Pockets and Ramen inside my door and then cordon off my room, please.

I shall ascend the stone steps of a cathedral while the choir sings angelically.

Hiding under the table while the missiles fly. Not all are pleased at our projected forthcoming lack of Romney in 2013.

Jesus is coming and he looks pissed.

I still think you mean Hannukah, goy. Here, have a latke.